But fear can also work for you in communicating with your doctor. Fear can make you stop and think for yourself. It can make you think seriously about all the alternatives before you and ask for explanations and support. Only then can you realistically evaluate the risks you have to take.
Talking About "What If . . .?" There is one subject that many cancer patients don't want to talk about. Sometimes this is called the "what if . . .?" scenario. What if the treatment doesn't help? What if everything that might help has already been done? What if the only goal now is to try to stay comfortable, physically and mentally?
It is hard to talk about all the aggressive treatments that might be used, the side effects and your critical need to always have hope, and at the same time discuss "what if?" You may not want to talk about it at all. You don't always need to. And your doctor will respect your wishes. But if you do want to discuss it, let your doctor know.
There is one aspect of "what if . . .?" that really should be discussed. If your situation does become grave, your doctor will need some guidance on how you want things handled. How heroic do you want your doctor to be, especially if the end seems near? If the situation does reach that stage, you may not be in any condition to discuss the question rationally. Your doctor may be able to talk it over with your family, but it is your wishes that are most important ( see "Survivorship" ).
